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| Artistic Expressions by Liz Almlie |
Listen to this sermon here!
Have you heard about the latest health epidemic? The
emotional and physical strain is real. No, I’m not talking about Coronavirus, although
that’s a concern, I’m suggesting we speak about something that affects way more
people. Do you know its name? Loneliness. That’s right, it’s a real health
crisis, and it’s on the rise. So what do we do about it? I’d like to offer a
statistic from a recent national study to open our hearts before hearing
scripture today. More than three in five Americans report being lonely,
which means if you don’t experience loneliness, the person sitting next to you
just might. Let’s begin our quest for hope with the story of creation. After
God creates a good, diverse, and beautiful world, God keeps right on creating,
because divine intelligence knows there’s something else important to enjoying
it all: companionship.
Genesis 2: 18-23, Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I
will make him a helper as his partner.” 19 So out
of the ground the Lord God formed every animal of the field and every bird of the
air, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever
the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The
man gave names to all cattle, and to the birds of the air, and to every animal
of the field; but for the man[c] there was not found a helper as his partner. 21 So
the Lord God
caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then he took one of his
ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the
rib that the Lord God had
taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then
the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh, this one shall be called
Woman, for out
of Man this one was taken.”
Being with someone who truly “gets” us is so
significant to our wellbeing, that God literally forms relationship as the
pinnacle of creation. “At last, bone of my bone.” It’s Lent, a time when we get
earthy about our wellbeing: so let me ask you, are you lonely? I’ve had
plenty of seasons in life where loneliness consumed me. It’s okay to admit- in
fact it’s good, because it means we can acknowledge how deeply we want someone
to “get” who we are. We can begin that journey right here: accepting Christ’s
companionship this Lent, the one who is ready and willing to take our hand
through whatever life throws our way. But sometimes God’s presence is hard to
feel apart from the tangible warmth of another human heart. Bone of our bone
and flesh of our flesh.
Which makes what I’m about to say so hard. One of the
more common reasons people share with me for why they haven’t attended worship
in a while is this: You know I love our church, but sometimes sitting in that
pew makes me feel, well I’m not sure, I guess…lonely. You can imagine how sad
that makes me, any minister. It could be unresolved grief, the absence of
family members, difficult memories, or spiritual wrestling from unanswered
questions. Whatever it is driving this loneliness, it’s real- and I know church
isn’t the only place it’s felt. But church IS the place it seems most
compelling for us to do the hard work of discerning why these feelings surface and
how we might do better at saying, “hello in there” to each other.
It’s not wrong to feel lonely, but it is wrong for us
to ignore folks when they express that emotion. I’ll admit, it can be hard for
me to understand why Sunday morning worship might feel lonely, given how much I
love all of you and how worship is ‘my thang’! But I do recognize that I get to
interact closely with you all, and for good reason, some of you don’t yet know
one another’s names! Maybe even after worshipping together for years. I know
it’s in part a product of our worship style. You do plenty of listening to me,
facing forward rather than one another, and our Sunday morning time feels
perpetually limited for deep conversation.
And it’s this engagement in deep and meaningful
conversations that will make an impact on someone’s loneliness. "In-person
connections are what really matters," says Doug
Nemecek, chief medical officer for behavioral
health at Cigna. "Sharing that time to have a meaningful interaction and
conversation, to share our lives with others, is important to help us mitigate
and minimize loneliness."
This recent study outlined by Elena
Renken points
out that social isolation (as it’s often called) is not confined to a certain
demographic, although young adults seem to be hit hardest. Just think about how
pervasive it is- 3 in 5 Americans! Some of you may be saying, “so I’m lonely,
so what!” I’ll tell you what research suggests. Loneliness tips the scales not
only of our mental health, depression and anxiety factoring in most heavily,
but also our physical wellbeing. Did you know that loneliness is demonstrated
to have as much negative effect on our life expectancy as smoking 15 cigarettes
a day? It also impacts cognitive decline, depression, and heart disease. It’s not
just a feeling, it’s a mental and physical health epidemic.
And from the very beginning, we’ve known this. Our
origin story tells us that it is not good for us to be alone, not without
significant and meaningful connections. Are you ready for the good news?
We ARE doing something about loneliness here in this church. We ARE taking
seriously our origin story and Christ’s call to embody him together. In these
past 3 years, you have helped discern new ways of saying YES to companionship
and deep conversation. I’d like to highlight three of these new ministries:
1.
Table Groups- we have 7 tables groups that launched this year, providing more
intentional conversation space around spiritual questions, with over 60 of you
taking part. And there’s always room for more at the table! These aren’t just
social gatherings, no, these are sacred spaces honoring the truth that we were
created for community (and laughter, and food).
2.
Messy Church- Our 1st Wednesday worship in Bradford Hall is anything but isolating.
We move around, we spill paint, we eat and laugh, we tell stories and let the
kids teach us something new about God’s love each month. And we worship facing
each other!
3.
Our 2020 pictorial directory- Soon you will have the chance to study up on each
other’s names! By including photos and contact info, we’re offering real ways
to connect on a personal level beyond our worship space. And all of this
matters deeply.
This is the good news- the great
news is that YOU can be involved in any or all of these ministries- saying,
“hello in there” to each other. We can work (one relationship at a time) to
minimize loneliness and build Christ’s beloved community. Above all else,
please do NOT feel guilty about being lonely. We place so much emphasis on
independence and privacy in our culture, even the most extroverted can have a
hard time seeking out companionship. A few weeks ago, my very extroverted
Grandma who’d been living in her own apartment suffered another stroke; by
doctor’s orders, my dad made the hard decision to place Grandma in a nursing
home. She resisted at first, as you can imagine, but (I just love this) within
24 hrs of moving there—no joke, less than a day—she called my dad to say,
“Wayne, this is my favorite place I’ve ever lived in my entire life!! I just
love it here, there’s a weekly bible study, great meals, a walking garden, and always
someone to talk to, all in the same place!! I just love it.”
Turns out, my independent
grandma needed someone to say, “hello in there,” on a daily basis, like we all
do. Let’s make 2020 the year we seek out the companionship Christ embodies, and
let’s be those companions for others too! It’s a beautiful world we live in,
made all the better by meaningful relationships. And if you haven’t heard it in
a while: “hello in there.”
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